Don't worry

Some people worry about their hair loss from the moment they wake up to the moment they fall asleep. Their day revolves around the amount of hair they lose in the morning. If they only lose a few hairs, then it means that the day is wonderful (even if it's raining); if the hair loss is high, the day is terrible (even if it's sunny).

It's difficult not to worry, but as long as you are treating the problem and have friends, family members, and/or doctors who are supportive, you're in good hands. Try to remain positive and optimistic - who knows what advances are around the corner?

Comparing your hair loss with others

A lot of people continually look at everyone else's hair, especially when traveling by bus or train. When they see someone with more hair than them, they get jealous; when they see someone with less hair than them, they get frightened.

Just because someone else has very thin hair, even in their family, it doesn't mean that their hair will continue thinning. There may be other factors contributing to that person's hair loss that have no bearing on his or her condition.

In addition, there will always be other people who we perceive as better looking or more intelligent than ourselves. Concerning yourself about a person's "better" hair takes away from the fact that you are doing everything possible to help your condition and so, hopefully, to improve your hair quantity.

Try not to worry - it's YOUR hair loss that matters to you, no one else's!

That sense of being stared at

Many people with hair loss feel that others are always looking at their thin spots or staring at their hair. This can make them feel very self-conscious and, in extreme cases, stop them from socializing at all.

This is almost certainly not happening as much as you think it is, people are probably not looking at your hair. Think back before you had hair loss. Were you looking at everyone else's hair to see whether it was thinning? Probably not. If you don't have a particular problem, then it wouldn't occur to you to look for it in another person. The person you think is looking at your hair may just be looking at you because you are conversing or because he or she likes the way you look.

When you socialize you are usually about three or four feet apart from the person to whom you are talking. Remember, they are not combing through your hair or looking at it when it's wet (which is usually when everyone's hair looks thinner). They probably can't see any obvious thinning because you've styled your hair to make it look its best. So try and enjoy yourself!

Spending money on hair loss treatments

Other people spend money at the hairdresser or barber and on makeup or aftershave - why should it be such a crime to spend money on hair loss treatments?

Obviously, you don't want to waste money on a magical hair cure, so it's up to you to make sure that you thoroughly research the treatment regimen that you are being advised to follow. Don't feel that you must make a decision immediately. Give yourself time to go home, and either discuss it with someone who is supportive or think about it yourself. Moreover, if you do follow a particular program, make sure that you give it at least three months to work.

Friends and family don't take my hair loss seriously!

It can be frustrating for a person with hair loss to hear "It doesn't look too bad" or "I don't know what you're talking about" or "There are worse things in life than losing your hair." Hair loss is relative to how you feel about it. Just because you're not bald doesn't mean you don't have hair loss. Just because you hide the condition well doesn't mean a problem doesn't exist. Don't feel guilty. If you're worried that your hair is thinning and your friends or family don't seem to be supportive, don't let that stop you from finding out how to address the problem.

Some people feel that talking to friends in an Internet chat room that deals with hair loss can help them feel more supported than talking to their families. The Internet also has the advantage of anonymity, so people in the chat room cannot physically see your condition (unless you send a photo). I have found this to be very helpful for some people and a great way to find out what other hair-loss sufferers are going through.

Running your hands through your hair

Many people continually run their hands through their hair to see whether it is still falling out and, if it is, by how much. This action can become obsessive, with some looking for how much hair is coming out literally hundreds of times a day.

Hair-loss amounts don't change that rapidly, so continuous pulling on the hair will not accurately indicate whether hair loss is improving or worsening. Also, I find that if a person pulls on his or her hair and does not see any hair the first time, he or she will often repeat the action four or five times until hair DOES comes out. It's almost as if some people want continuous proof that their hair is falling out.

If you find yourself doing this, try to become more aware of the action. It can be habitual and you may find that you don't realize you're doing it. Try to find something else to keep your hands active, like blogging!

Collecting hair in the shower!

It's fine in the short term to monitor daily fluctuations in hair fall. However, there are people who have collected their hair for many months or years and have kept them all!

They don't really need past visual reminders that their hair was falling out excessively; they can see by today's wash whether it is still falling out. If you're a counter, make sure to do it only infrequently (every two weeks or monthly), as the hair loss amounts will not change rapidly on a daily basis. Also, only count the wash hairs. Do not try to count every hair that you lose, as it's impractical to collect all the hairs from your pillow, clothing, and so on!

Talking about hair loss

A lot of people cringe if anyone mentions their hair loss to them. The last thing they would want is to be told that their hair has become thin enough for someone else to see. Also, some of them have said that they notice other people in their workplace with thinning hair. They want to talk to them about it but hesitate because they aren't sure what their reaction will be.

Although I think it is often helpful for people to talk about their condition with others, I also think it's best not to approach another person with hair loss unless he or she approaches you first. Many people don't want to be reminded of their problem or are reluctant to talk about it. In these situations, if you are confident enough, perhaps the best thing to do is talk in a group about your hair loss and what you're doing to combat it within earshot of the other person, then see whether he or she approaches you at a later time.

I'm frightened that my hair isn't growing back

Often, people with hair loss feel that their hair is not growing back and that they will be bald in a matter of weeks. For most hair-loss conditions, such as genetic hair loss and telogen effluvium, this is not true. The hair does regrow, although it may go through a longer resting phase. The first things to look for with regrowth are the presence of roots (if you color your hair) or the need for a haircut. Under both these circumstances, you know that the hair that is not falling out is growing.

To see whether there is any new hair, dry your hair after a hair wash and look along the parting. You will see some shorter hairs, which indicate that new hairs are growing. This means that although you are losing lots of hair, some of it is regrowing.

Overcoming the Psychological Effects of Hair Loss

How can you overcome your fears and get back to living a normal life?

The first thing I want to stress is that if your hair loss worries are truly changing the way you live your life, consider seeking professional help from a doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist who understands the issues you are experiencing.

For many people, hair-wash days are the worst days of the week; this is when they see lots of hair falling out. People dread having to wash their hair but know it is necessary because their hair is starting to look dirty and their scalp is itchy.

Most hair that you see lost during the wash stopped growing approximately six to sixteen weeks before. The less the hair is washed, the more hair loss accumulates. So don't be afraid to wash your hair. In fact, wash it as frequently as you are able and you'll actually see less hair fall out. In addition, your hair looks best when it is freshly washed and dried. It tends to have more body and shine and will allow you to look your best as you start your day. Don't be afraid to use styling products, colors, or perms, as these will give your hair more body and boost the way you feel about it. Washing hair does not cause more hair to fall out.